It seems that there is a new trend every day in the teen community. Social media is a huge part of most teens’ lives these days and it is no surprise that this has been an easy way for kids to hide behind a screen and say things that they might not be willing to say to a person’s face. A new and popular app that works with Snapchat is just the most recent way for bullies to do their deeds without being held accountable for anything that they say. Yolo is an app that allows for kids to respond to questions or statements and to do so with an anonymous response.
Kids are posting things such as TBH (to be honest) or just something so simple as “say something” on their snap stories and with yolo are receiving anonymous responses. The responses are often harmless things and many times even compliments, but not always. This opens up the person to many vulgar comments and harassing attacks.
I have discussed this app with my children and while they know I think it is a tool for bullies I had not banned them from using it. I trust both of my children and they know that by using it they need to be prepared for what people may write to them. They also know that I do not approve of them reposting garbage that people send and that I would want to know if inappropriate things were said to them. I also have both of my kids on all of their social media accounts as friends and they know that I can spot check their phones at any point without notice. I rarely do however, because my kids are very open with me and I trust them completely.
My daughter decided to post one of these things on her snap story a couple of days ago. She simple wrote, “Say something”. Many of her friends replied with silly phrases that are inside jokes between them or random comments about nothing of any substance. There were a few telling her she is pretty or asking her for a TBH and overall they were all pretty harmless….except one. One person decided to attack her at the heart of who she is. My daughter has decided to wear a ring that is a symbol of her desire to wait for sex until marriage because of her faith in God and her belief that this is what is right. She received a yolo that stated, “F%*k that virgin ring”. There was nothing further written and of course the person who wrote it didn’t claim who they were. I could not have been more proud of how my daughter handled this. While she was hurt that someone would say something like that to her, she used it as an opportunity to speak about her faith and share some scripture. She quoted several verses and went on to explain why she believes what she does.
How sad though, that this is what goes on with our youth. I never thought I would see the day that my daughter was made fun of for NOT sleeping around and for having sound moral values. I am so proud of her for the strength and maturity that she showed in this situation which is more than I can say for the anonymous poster. I just encourage you all to keep an eye on what your kids are doing. They may be victims of nastiness or they may be the bullies but either way there is a lot of this stuff going on. I have seen girls younger than my daughter posting these questions or comment things and getting numerous responses that might make a grown man blush. Responses are vulgar and cheap and things that might be said to a prostitute and should never be said to a young “lady”. I sadly think that many of these girls take this vulgarity as compliments since it comes along with statements like, “You’re so hot”. They don’t stop to think that they are being disrespected and only looked at as sexual objects. And I would be mortified if my son ever even thought it was ok to say these things to a girl.
YOLO stands for “you only live once” and I guess that is the theory many of these kids are living by these days. Sleep around, do drugs, drink and drive because you only live once. Guess what kiddos, you only die once too!! I am all about living life to the fullest because you never know when your last day might be, but what about living with some self-respect and standards? Instead of someday having to admit to your own children that the list of your conquests can’t be counted on your fingers, maybe take a little pride and value in yourself. Be someone others can be proud of and certainly support those who are trying to make respectable choices. You do only live once, so live a life that in the end you won’t look back on with shame or regret.